Re: *** in public is a fine thing which doesn't bother anyone

"Curly Surmudgeon" <CurlySurmudgeon_at_@[EMAIL PROTECTED]
> wrote in message 
news:481a35a8$0$29573$a82e2bb9@[EMAIL PROTECTED]
> On Wed, 30 Apr 2008 11:31:33 -0700, gooddad wrote:
>
>> People who are against *** are ugly fat people who can't get laid, or
are
>> people who have never been ****ed good.
>
> Are you really this stupid?  Let me relate a story:
>
> From our earliest years one favorite pastime was to visit San Francisco
> for fresh Dungeness Crab.  We'd pack a backpack with cutting board,
> newspaper(tablecloth), bottle of wine, stick of real butter, and a
> Martinelli's Sparkling Cider for our daughter.  Most times we'd
patronize
> Cresci Bros on the Wharf (now the "Crab Depot").  My daughter and I
would
> spend an inordinate amount of time selecting the freshest live crab then
> wait the 22 minutes while it cooked.  During that time we'd stroll
across
> the street and buy a loaf of hot Boudin's Sourdough Bread.
>
> When the weather was nice we'd eat on the pier behind or Aquatic Park
but
> this is a Northern California coastal town and in the winter it can be
> quite brisk.  For those times we'd eat inside the Cannery or 
> Exploratorium.
>
> One day, in the Cannery, Harry <something>, an aspiring magician later
to
> get his own tv show, was performing.  We sat in the back at an outdoor
> dining table and this time had bought a bottle in town as I'd not had a
> white wine acceptable for crab.  To that end we'd also brought a small
> styrofoam cooler with ice to quickly chill the wine a bit.  The 2.5 hour
> trip turned the ice into slush, all the better for our purposes.
>
> We dug into a late lunch, famished, while keeping an eye on the stage
and
> act.  Harry was hilarious.  Harry first noticed this weirdo two tables
> away dry-humping the bench oblivious to the world. (or perhaps got his
> jollies this way)  No matter what Harry said the guy wouldn't cease
> ****ing a wooden bench like it was Sophia Loren.
>
> My daughter was about 8 years old and intensely curious about what was
> going on and "what is that guy doing, daddy?"  After gentle prodding
from
> the stage and hoots from the audience I walked over and emptied the ice
> chest on the asshole.  Instead of reacting he stood up and calmly walked
> away as if nothing had happened.
>
> ****ing in public offends people.  Part of the responsibility for living
> in a civilization is to consider the mores of others and not
intentionally
> goading people.  You may think it's ok to have *** in public, I don't.
>
> Depending on the cir***stances you should expect either, a foot in the
> ass, arrest and incarceration, objective opinions on your ***** size,
> quality, style, speed, and lovemaking, insults, violence.  Any or all of
> the aforementioned in fact.
>
> ****ing in the forest for the squirrels and birds is one thing, in the
> public square is another.  It's a pretty simple concept, what's wrong
your
> head?
>
>> *** in public should be legal.  It's the oldest act known to mankind,
and
>> your unalienable right.
>
> As someone else said, "Tell that to the judge."


Far be it for me to knitpick your story, but what makes one live crab more

fresh than the others, and when you emptied the ice chest on the asshole, 
was that literally the asshole, or just figuratively speaking?